Broken Glass, or A Mobile Mosaic

It... it was a thing that happened.

Cosplayers. So many cosplayers. So many epic, seriously epic cosplays. We saw a guy in a full-body dragon suit that was about ten feet tall. There were Links, good and bad, and lots of Doctors in various incarnations and regenerations (including Doctor Horrible), and a Rincewind (at least one) and lots and lotsa ponies (two that were in FULL pony costume!) and lots of stormtroopers, and quite a few military pieces (DML was full-out in 'Nam gear, all the accurate military issue, except for an airsoft gun), and a Dovahkiin and a Forsworn and several TARDISes (but no Idris, sadface), and at least one Kaylee (squee!) and a few Thors and just all the yes. (And a few "...wut."s) Squee, squee, squee.

Of course, this also required being surrounded by Lots And Lots Of People for three straight days, and then some. The PPC (and PPC-expat) group was amazing, everyone was awesome and totally real and made of cells/molecules and everything (except Phobos, who is made of stories, not molecules), and stuff was awesome. We played Sea Dracula (has nothing to do with Dracula or the sea (unless you want it to) but still awesome), and I played Rabbitloop McDevilface and Dann played Laserfish Jenkins and Phobos played Pickle Albatross (a sloth) Esq., and Data played Magic Mark and Dann called Robot Santa (the evil one) to the stand and guys Phobos makes an excellent Evil Robot Santa and totally won the game, and there were lots of crazy dance-offs and I represented the hydro-oxygen separatist party (end the forced conjoining of hydrogen and oxygen!) and it was crazy and awesome. Exhausting as hell, but awesome.

Also, caffeinated smoothies were the food of the week, oh my God they are amazing delicious and caffeinated without the sudden EVERYTHING IS MADE OF ACID and glarblegarghrar.

And I has a boy, I has a Dann even, and he is the best of all the people. And we have about the same level of People-Noise we can take before both of us withdraw to engage Crankiness Avoidance Procedures, and guys do you know how awesome it is to just sit and read quietly (and occasionally not-quietly) with a dude? And we have shared universes in our head, which is awesome, because not only are we in the same universe, but we can go to other universes and talk about Mars and mean the same Mars and guys, Bogdanov|Boone for 2016, yeah he's fictional Russian SO WHAT.

(I discovered a knitting/sewing shop in the center of work!town, I can make stuff now, and Bogdanov|Boone 2016 is a shirt that will be made. Two, actually, and one goes to Dann.)

So now is a bit of a crash, but it's weird, because I'm still... happy, because it's only until January and then we get to spend time together without con-level-craziness, and this is awesome! It was incredibly painful at the airport, not made better by having to wait around for my plane to land after seeing him off, but it will not be long before we are together again, and I am going to see the rest of the world with him.

We're gonna take the world by storm, guys. If Bogdanovism isn't a thing yet, it will be by the time we're done. And it's gonna be awesome.

1) I am monogamous. I am naturally monogamous. I was born this way. I don't want more than one person. I only want one person. I understand completely that other people are not necessarily monogamous. Some people have feelings of love for more than one person at a time. That's the way they were born. Fine, cool, great, lovely. Love is the important thing. Or happiness. Or whatever floats your boat, whatever, seriously.

But the next time someone tells me monogamy is unnatural, or puts fucking quotation marks around it, I am going to either punch them or call them a bigot. Probably the latter, because I'm a hopeless pacifist. (ETA: Seriously, it's just, how is this any better than claiming homosexuality/bisexuality/intersexuality is unnatural? I was born this way. Telling me I don't know my own orientation is bigotry, no matter which part of it you're objecting to.)

Some people are born with a natural attraction to the same sex. Some people are born with a natural attraction to the opposite sex. Some people are born with a natural attraction to more than one person at a time. Some people are born with no attraction to anyone at all. Some people are born into the wrong gendered body. Some people are attracted to both sexes, but only one person at a time. Some people are attracted to a lot of people.

I'm monogamous. I respect the rights of any consenting adults to do as they please. Polyamorous individuals deserve the same respect and rights as the rest of the world, this is a thing I believe. But that does not make my relationship invalid. Your attraction is not mine. Your kink is not my kink. Your relationship may be perfect for you, but wouldn't work at all for me. And vice versa!

Seriously, Can't We All Just Get Along?

2) I think Character is more important than Sex, in stories. (And I see the world in stories, often.)

Thus, I get really grumbly when I go to try and find a story that pokes at the characters and pulls on their motives and explores the nuances of their relationship... and it's just an excuse to see Hawt Sexorz. I mean, ain't nothin' wrong with erotica! I like the odd explicit ficlet. And, yes, I definitely understand the desire to write Taylor/Mira. I just am like "Woot, Wash and Taylor!" aaaaand every single story is about them hooking up. Which is all kinds of o.O if only because he's her commanding officer. So much Do Not Want.

I want to read a story about mutual respect and friendship and a long relationship of things other than sex between Wash and Taylor. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK FOR. (Also? I really can't see Taylor moving on from his wife. In that one ep, he nearly slit his own throat over her. He's not the type to let go, and I think one of the stories did make the excellent point that even he isn't Taylor anymore. Taylor is a legend no one could live up to.

...Also I want to write a short 'fic that explores what happened in the episode with the Frontier Justice that I complained about. With a Vimes-type instead of Shannon. I like where Shannon is going, and I like that he did grow a spine later on. But I really, really do not like what happened in that episode. And I want to write an AU about it. And I think I will.

...I think that's it.

Hey, everyone. It's The Holidays. I'm tired, cranky, and it feels like every single thing I have done today has gone horribly wrong, except for the one thing this morning, when I changed my oil with my dad. That's a good thing!

Everything else has been a long, drawn-out event of Fail.

Uh. This is something I posted to Facebook, and to my blog-thing, and nowhere else because it is really rather unfinished. But I'll post it here anyway, and apologize for the double-post, because I really am curious about thoughts you might have. (And suggestions for polishing, which it does need.)

Author's Note: I am kind of a shite writer sometimes. This is one of those times; I've had this flowing about my mind for a good few months/years now, but it always seemed like... like writing out the steps to an equation that you see complete in your head-- which is actually a lot harder than writing something complicated out-- it seems self-explanatory. But. All the same, here is the first bit; when I have a bit of time to breathe, think, and re-calibrate my head, I will write the second, which deals with "What God hath made clean call not thou unclean," and, if I were a philologist of absolutely any skill whatsoever, would also deal with the works of the Apostle Paul, and why I don't think what he is saying is what a lot of people think he is saying. As it stands I might try and touch on the point that he was writing to wayward churches with advice, not transcribing The Words of Jesus to all Christians everywhere at any point in the future. Or I might leave it-- sometimes it's better to have three decent points than three decent... and one weak.

Let me begin with a disclaimer. I am not the best person to write this—nor anywhere near the top of the list. I am not as wise, nor as eloquent, nor as learned a writer as it takes to do this subject justice. Furthermore, it has been said before, I’m sure, and will be said again, more eloquently – and again, and again, and again, I hope, until it is no longer necessary to repeat; until we are, as the poet says, too old to need such crutches. In the meantime-- here goes nothing.

With the disclaimer out of the way, a more… traditional introduction is in order. This is a hard essay for me to write, simply because the final conclusion is something I reached a long, long time ago; it’s something I find self-explanatory, and I don’t know how to convey that simplicity.

Put succinctly – expect rewrites.

To the Christians the world over—every church deacon and pastor and preacher and priest and bishop, and every authority who’s made the claim that God Hates X. Unless that blank is filled with a word like ‘bigotry,’ ‘hatred,’ ‘hypocrisy,’ and especially if it is filled with a specific group of people, consider this essay directed almost entirely at you. I am a Christian, and it’s taken me a while to be able to say that again without wincing at all the implications – after seeing what this religion can be capable of, it’s hard to then take a deep breath and go back, and say to myself that it’s the institution, the people in charge – that I have no beef with God (at least, most of the time – I will admit to a fair amount of skyward-fist-shaking, and furious profanities shouted in quiet dark spaces), that I have never disbelieved in Christ.

That I believe in Love.

For that is the greatest commandment, is it not? Love the Lord thy God, with all thy heart, and all with thy soul, and with all thy mind. No side-stepping, no hemming or hawing; that’s straight out of the KJV, the Bible the more strict churches believe is The One And Only Word, right down to the punctuation. Love thy God; love thy neighbor. These, Jesus says, are the greatest – there are no commandments greater than these. But what does that mean? Love thy God – how, exactly, are we to do that? Besides an internal belief, and surely that isn’t all, what are we to do?

Peter doesn’t ask this at the time – I can’t recall if any of the disciples do. It’s a lawyer who originally asks him what the greatest commandment is – what he must do to inherit eternal life, depending on which gospel you’re reading. But at the end of the gospels, Jesus asks Peter. I’ll just… I can’t paraphrase this.

“So when they had dined, Jesus saith to Simon Peter, Simon, [son] of Jonas, lovest thou me more than these? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my lambs.

“He saith to him again the second time, Simon, [son] of Jonas, lovest thou me? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my sheep.

“He saith unto him the third time, Simon, [son] of Jonas, lovest thou me? Peter was grieved because he said unto him the third time, Lovest thou me? And he said unto him, Lord, thou knowest all things; thou knowest that I love thee. Jesus saith unto him, Feed my sheep.” (John 21:15-17)

Unless there’s an entire lost gospel kicking around somewhere about Jesus’ time as a shepherd, those are metaphorical sheep there he’s talking about. The message is clear: If you love me, take care of your brethren—your neighbors. Everyone you can. My sheep. My flock. You. How do you uphold the first commandment? Follow the second.

God is Love. Over, and over, and over again, this crops up in Christianity. So why is it that apparently, in order to worship Him, we need to wear nice clothes to church every Sunday, marry a nice boy/girl (depending, obviously, on gender) in our own social group, always support our country first, and spend much of our life shaking our heads in disapproval at those who don’t follow our set of rules? All of our rules are meaningless – yes, everything even The Apostle Paul wrote, everything that does not uphold those two commandments. Love thy God; love thy neighbor. If it’s not supporting that, what is the point?

So there’s my first proof. But that doesn’t quite hit the heart of the matter; there are plenty of people who preach the doctrine ‘Love the sinner, hate the sin,’ and in this manner avoid outright acts of violence towards any subgroup they disagree with, while at the same time telling them, basically, that their love is something God hates. That they are condemned as sinners – oh, of course we all are – but… they are, moreso, for something they didn’t choose.

Here, I will pause the sermon-type bits to make a short point that I find very difficult to talk about LGBTQ without mentioning. Often, the argument or debate or discussion quickly disintegrates into a snit-fight over whether homosexuality/bisexuality, etc. is something natural, or something chosen. I have one quick question to every single person who’s about to rush me with one finger upheld, pointing, condemning, or, most infuriatingly, holding up invented 'studies'. Look at your Significant Other. Your Better Half; your fiancé, fiancée, your wife, your husband, your lover, the one person who you want to spend your life with. Look at everything that makes you love them – if you will, an itemized list. (Note: Do not actually try to make an itemized list. It’ll take you a good few eternities, I assure you.)

Did you choose that? Did you choose her eyes that make you smile? Did you choose to have that little flutter in your chest every time he looks at you? Did you make a conscious choice, at some point, to first be attracted to that person, and then to fall in love with them? (...Or to fall in love with them and then find yourself blown away when you actually meet them face to face?) Somehow, I doubt it. So unless you’re about to tell me that you made the conscious decision to be attracted to girls with red hair, to really tall guys, to girls with dark eyes, to guys with green eyes, or to guys or girls at all, I don’t want to hear it. Nobody chooses who they fall in love with, okay? Moving on, now.

I'll pick this up later with a Part Two. But I'll summarize that Part Two now by saying that it is unbelievably hypocritical to blather on about homosexuality being a huge, incredible, horrible sin, to persecute and attack and marginalize the very humanity of couples, two people whose major crime seems to be loving one another, while ignoring the rest of Leviticus. And before you go on and point out that shrimp and unclean animals are allowed by Peter's vision, I will quote that passage: "What God hath made clean, call not thou unclean." God seems to have scattered people in all different molds. I'm pretty sure His intention was not to make some automatically more powerful than others, simply by dint of being born out of the majority. And before you put on airs about that passage applying to food, not people, and who do I think I am anyway, I will roll my eyes in advance, and point out that the same passage of Leviticus forbids women to leave their rooms while on their period, forbids men from touching them, or sitting where they have sat, and declares that if a man rapes a woman who is not betrothed, they must be married. (If she is betrothed, her family/fiance gets to kill the rapist! Fun times.) That passage was never specifically refuted either! (Unclean, unclean!)

Now I'm going to go beat my head against the wall until the overtired crazy goes away, and write that rest thingy later.

I should also add, as an aside... this is not meant to be patronizing. As I said, it's a letter to Christendom, explaining... well, why I think they're wrong. It could be argued that everything I've said here is heresy-- so be it. But I don't want anyone thinking this is a "Hey, gay dudes, lesbians, trans people! It's okay, you have my religion's permission to love, now!" It's more... a statement of belief-- I don't think love is condemned by my religion, or ever has been. I think we got something wrong, somewhere a long ways back.